And I am officially appealing. This ruling appears to be based on pure emotion, and unfortunately violates several of the leagues bylaws. I beg him to change his mind before I go all Carlos Zambrano on his behind. This decision appears to be based on beard envy, and is intentionally biased.
Here is his "ruling":
Ok, if I'm going to be commish, I'm taking a cue from Kenesaw Mountain Landis and assuming absolute dictatorial powers for life.
First order of business:
David Wright is permanently banned from baseball for being a smarmy goober who stole Chipper Jones' Gold Glove in '07. All Wright cards -1 pts. Chipper Jones is restored the Gold Glove and gets +1 pts. Don't like it? shouldn't have made me Acting Commissioner for Life.
Ok, a judgement on the matter at hand:
A-Rod road to 500 cards are a complete waste of paper and foil and are an affront to all that is good and vintage. Awful, terrible, useless cards. My first instinct is -10 points, but having pulled many of these from retro packs I know the agony of seeing that shiny holofoil peeking out between the cardboard so I won't add to the pain with such a harsh verdict.
A-Rod Road to 500 cards: -3 pts.
I AM THE LAW
Is Motherscratcher paying you off? If so, I'll double it!
You can't just up and change the rules of the game 1/3 of the way into the season. You especially cannot do so without having a majority vote from the league's owners. While I agree that it was an oversight on our part not to put Chipper on the "stars" list, the game has already started, and we've already been keeping score. Motherscratcher and I are both way too lazy to go back and update our previous scores to reflect your Wright v. Chipper ruling.
As to the A-Fraud ruling, while I can't argue your logic (which is brilliant) I can attempt to pander and flatter you into making that card at least worth 1 point, so I don't lose the pack. I mean he IS on the "stars" list that was decided upon prior to the start of this contest. He is a cheater, and I personally hate him more than any other player in the game, but we're talking about the difference between a win and a loss of a pack here. The stakes are most certainly high. Turk-Offs are not to be taken lightly.
Commish, I beg you to seriously think about possibly changing you mind. You are a wise and reasonable man when not emotionally distraught over perceived slights in the Gold Glove department, or a serious case of beard envy. Think about the integrity of the game, and how important it is that I achieve victory by any means necessary.
My grievance can of course be silenced if the Commish were to send out a large package of Nick Markakis or Adam Jones cards.
I look forward to your revised ruling...Sir.
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